Depression Recovery

Question:

> Thanks for letting us know how she is doing.  Sometimes it can take a while > for meds to kick in, and sometimes it takes some time to discover the right > dosage/type of medication.  It’s important to be "assertive" with doctors, > especially when a person is starting on a med regime.   If she starts having > problems again, she can always go back for more "adjustment".  I’m glad she > has a supportive, patient partner.  It can make all the difference for > "mentally" ill people.  :-)

Second that! My first experience with an antidepressant was dreadful, totally the wrong medication for me. The next one worked much better, and once it had time to kick in and we found the proper dosage, things improved dramatically.

Response:

Thanks for letting us know how she is doing.  Sometimes it can take a while for meds to kick in, and sometimes it takes some time to discover the right dosage/type of medication.  It’s important to be "assertive" with doctors, especially when a person is starting on a med regime.   If she starts having problems again, she can always go back for more "adjustment".  I’m glad she has a supportive, patient partner.  It can make all the difference for "mentally" ill people.  :-) Diane M.

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> Just wanted to say thanks for all the advice. I didn’t tell her to > smoke again. I encouraged her to go back to the doctor and she did. > Actually, she had seen a psychiatrist and been given some medication, > but it  didn’t seem to help at all… If anything it made things > worse. When she went back a couple of days ago, the doctor adjusted > the dosage (doubled it). I’m happy to say she seems to be doing much > much better, just about 100% normal in fact. > If anyone else has similar situation and reads this, I really strongly > suggest seeing a psychiatrist or psychologist. don’t just think its > the lack of smoking that’s causing your problems, you may well be > suffering from chronic depression or something like my girlfriend, and > the medication really works. > Anyway, thanks again.

Response:

Just wanted to say thanks for all the advice. I didn’t tell her to smoke again. I encouraged her to go back to the doctor and she did. Actually, she had seen a psychiatrist and been given some medication, but it  didn’t seem to help at all… If anything it made things worse. When she went back a couple of days ago, the doctor adjusted the dosage (doubled it). I’m happy to say she seems to be doing much much better, just about 100% normal in fact. If anyone else has similar situation and reads this, I really strongly suggest seeing a psychiatrist or psychologist. don’t just think its the lack of smoking that’s causing your problems, you may well be suffering from chronic depression or something like my girlfriend, and the medication really works. Anyway, thanks again.

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Just wanted to say thanks for all the advice. I didn’t tell her to > smoke again. I encouraged her to go back to the doctor and she did. > Actually, she had seen a psychiatrist and been given some medication, > but it  didn’t seem to help at all… If anything it made things > worse. When she went back a couple of days ago, the doctor adjusted > the dosage (doubled it). I’m happy to say she seems to be doing much > much better, just about 100% normal in fact. > If anyone else has similar situation and reads this, I really strongly > suggest seeing a psychiatrist or psychologist. don’t just think its > the lack of smoking that’s causing your problems, you may well be > suffering from chronic depression or something like my girlfriend, and > the medication really works. > Anyway, thanks again.

Good to hear Adam – thanks for coming back and letting us know. It sounds like your girlfriend has a very caring boyfriend – lovely to see! So glad she is doing so much better…and still quit! Paula

Response:

> My girlfriend quit smoking almost 6 months ago and is still having a > terrible time. She feels despair and anxiety 24/7. I have never smoked > and am afraid I don’t relate very well, as much as I try. She says its > getting worse all the time, and I can’t tell her when it’s going to > get better, only that it will get better.

You’ve already gotten some very good advice with regard to your girlfriend seeing a mental health professional. One thing I’d like to add is she should understand needing help with a broken brain is no different than needing help for a broken leg. The proper treatment can work wonders. Most depression is very treatable, and if she needs medication, the proper kind will help enormously. It  really will get better. No one should suffer dispair and anxiety like this needlessly. One other thing, if she can hang on to her quit, it will be something that can provide comfort and a feeling of success in the future and may really help with her recovery.

Response:

Adam,    I have no medical credentials but can give you some info from my experience.  By 6 months this is no longer withdrawal from nicotine addiction.  The nicotine is mostly gone from you system the first 3 days and the physical addiction only last another day or two.   By 6 months she should have changed enough of those daily habits from smoking related to non smoking related that things really are getting easier.  What could this be I cannot be sure.   I do have a suggestion though.  One thing nicotine does is hide your emotions.  When all those strong emotions come to the surface it does take some folks a good bit of time to learn to deal with them.  This is especially true for very long term smokers.  That may be part of the issues and maybe there are some issues that should have been dealt with medically years ago.     With that said my best suggestion is to have a medical examination for any physical issues and maybe a psychological examination for an emotional issues. Only trained medical professionals can tell for sure if that is the problem and what should be done about it.  At this point thats the best advice I can give to you. Ian OOF — 8y 8m 4w 1d 16:03 smoke-free, 108,580 cigs not smoked, $13,398.77 saved, – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >My girlfriend quit smoking almost 6 months ago and is still having a >terrible time. She feels despair and anxiety 24/7. I have never smoked >and am afraid I don’t relate very well, as much as I try. She says its >getting worse all the time, and I can’t tell her when it’s going to >get better, only that it will get better. >She says she wants to die, that she feels so bad she could take her >life. I don’t know if its the addiction talking or if she is really >suicidal, but I’m very worried. We have a long distance relationship, >so I can’t watch her or help in any way physically. Should I just tell >her to go ahead and smoke again?

Response:

>My girlfriend quit smoking almost 6 months ago and is still having a >terrible time. She feels despair and anxiety 24/7. I have never smoked >and am afraid I don’t relate very well, as much as I try. She says its >getting worse all the time, and I can’t tell her when it’s going to >get better, only that it will get better.

It should have begun to get better by now, IMHO (although everyone is different, of course).  It does sound as though she has more problems than just her addiction to smoking. >She says she wants to die, that she feels so bad she could take her >life. I don’t know if its the addiction talking or if she is really >suicidal, but I’m very worried. We have a long distance relationship, >so I can’t watch her or help in any way physically. Should I just tell >her to go ahead and smoke again?

Please try to get her to see a doctor ASAP.  He will be able to help her deal with her depression.  If there is anyone nearby whom you can contact and you trust, see if you can get them to visit her and make sure she is OK for the moment. I don’t believe smoking is going to solve her problem – and if she has stuck it out this long, neither does she. Lemming — Curiosity *may* have killed Schrodinger’s cat. http://goldcrossdata.co.uk/                      ICQ: 8647501

Response:

A lot of people have mood problems right after they quit, but most get better after a few months.  A very small percentage of people who quit smoking find that they were using smoking to cover up mental disorders. Quitting can bring those disorders to light, and in some instances, make them worse.  Unfortuneately, starting smoking again doesn’t necessarily cure the disorder or take the person back to where they were when they smoked. It sounds as if your girlfriend needs to be evaluated by a psychiatric professional.  Soon.  Not a general practitioner – a psychiatrist.  Wanting to die is a very bad sign, but talk of taking her own life should never be ignored or dismissed as "not serious".  If the choice is between dying and smoking, I am a firm believer that smoking is a better option – but there are MUCH better options for treating depression than smoking.  Have her get to someone who can help her find them.  Now.  It will get better, but she may need some help, at least short term, to make it get better.  Good Luck. Diane M. … who was there

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> My girlfriend quit smoking almost 6 months ago and is still having a > terrible time. She feels despair and anxiety 24/7. I have never smoked > and am afraid I don’t relate very well, as much as I try. She says its > getting worse all the time, and I can’t tell her when it’s going to > get better, only that it will get better. > She says she wants to die, that she feels so bad she could take her > life. I don’t know if its the addiction talking or if she is really > suicidal, but I’m very worried. We have a long distance relationship, > so I can’t watch her or help in any way physically. Should I just tell > her to go ahead and smoke again?

Response:

Hi Adam, *please* don’t tell your girlfriend to start smoking again. I’ve been in a similar situation and, in my opinion, I don’t think it’s quitting smoking that’s bothering her but she’s blaming it on that so she can go back to it to stuff away what is really at the root of her despair and anxiety. I would encourage her to talk to her doctor, explain that she’s quit and for how long. If she doesn’t feel comfortable talking to him/her then she needs to find a professional she is comfortable talking to. If she’s got to six months without smoking then deep down she doesn’t really want to start again, she wouldn’t continue to put herself though this suffering if she really thought smoking would make her feel better. hope this helps hugs padders (